Confronting the 'She'll Be Right' Culture: Its Impact on Men's Mental Health

Daily Dose of Integrity

In New Zealand men often use the slang phrase "She'll be right" to dismiss any negative feelings they're having.

As someone who has been face-to-face with a lot of suicidal people throughout most of my career, I’ve seen a dark truth about New Zealand come through.

For me, it all began when the most popular guy in my high school committed suicide.

It was right around the age of 18 or so—I think we had just left high school—and we found out that he had killed himself.

For me, that was a mind-boggling experience.

I didn’t know him particularly well; I spent some time with him, but what I knew him to be was the most loved person in our year.

He was the most popular kid in our school, undeniably.

And yet, he was so depressed that he killed himself. And for me, this raised a question: If he had all that so-called privilege, why? Why did he do it?

I’ve worked with a lot of people who have depression and other mental illnesses, and I’ve worked with a lot of suicidal people, some of whom went on to do it.

There are these other factors in New Zealand's culture that I believe contribute greatly to the risk of suicide.

This kind of cultural motivation we have to present ourselves as uncaring and unaffected, to not rock the boat, to avoid confrontations and conflicts, to not be angry, to not be annoyed, to take pride in not caring about anything.

This idea that if you feel something, if you’re strongly affected by something, you’re somehow a failure.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here:

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